Guess this guy hasn't watched enough CSI:

A state forensics scientist who said she tested DNA in her husband's underwear to find out whether he was cheating could be disciplined if investigators determine she violated the use of state equipment.

Ann Chamberlain-Gordon of Okemos testified in a March 7 divorce hearing that she ran the test in September on the underwear of Charles Gordon Jr. Asked by his attorney what she found, she answered: “Another female. It wasn't me.''

These clowns obviously aren’t “for” the people.  Throw the bums out next time around:

Just 16% of American voters now say that Congress is doing a Good (14%) or an Excellent (2%) job. That’s down from 19% in mid-June and from 26% at the end of May. Today, 35% say Congress is doing a Fair job while 46% say Poor

I knew it wasn't really a weather ballon:

Lieutenant Walter Haut was the public relations officer at the base in 1947 and was the man who issued the original and subsequent press releases after the crash on the orders of the base commander, Colonel William Blanchard.

Haut died last year but left a sworn affidavit to be opened only after his death.

Last week, the text was released and asserts that the weather balloon claim was a cover story and that the real object had been recovered by the military and stored in a hangar.

Idiot stands nearby to watch and film a firework factory go up in flames.  He didn't survive.

Fanatics are picturesque, mankind would
rather see gestures than listen to reasons. 

An invasion of Chinese rubber duckies that is:

The armada of 29,000 plastic yellow ducks, blue turtles and green frogs broke free from a cargo ship 15 years ago.

Since then they have travelled 17,000 miles, floating over the site where the Titanic sank, landing in Hawaii and even spending years frozen in an Arctic ice pack.

And now they are heading straight for Britain. At some point this summer they are expected to be spotted on beaches in South-West England.